Welcome,
I'm Louise, aka Mama to Jonny and Skye.
Having trained initially as an Occupational Therapist in the UK where I’m originally from, I always found myself focusing on how the things people do impact their sense of self, and vice versa - referred to in the field as Occupational Identity. Never was this truer than during my own personal reflections on becoming a mama, I couldn’t help but notice how these same processes were at play. It seems obvious: now I had kids of course it changed who I was but as we all know it runs so much deeper than that.
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The problem is, they had left this out of the pregnancy and parenting books.
There was this person, or at least parts of, that I grieved for, and times that I didn’t even recognize who I was.
My matrescence so far…
I would be considered one of the ‘lucky ones’. Both my babies weren’t terrible sleepers (not amazing either mind you), I have a loving partner, supportive family, and a very comfortable roof over my head. Yet I would still find myself feeling conflicted and lost. I was fortunate to avoid severe post-natal depression or anxiety but for me it was still a slow burn. There was this person, or at least parts of, that I grieved for, and times that I didn’t even recognize who I was.
My return to work was one of the most challenging times, even though I was excited to do it. Like so many I felt intense imposter syndrome while I was there, and like a complete failure as a parent when I got home. Then when I had the opportunity to care for my son full time, I experienced so much guilt about wanting time away, fighting the pressure from society’s image of ‘the perfect mother’ and the way I was parented, not to mention the heavy heavy mental load, and constant struggle to implement self-care that I knew I so desperately needed (sound familiar?!). These are just a few of the pushes and pulls we feel in motherhood.
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It wasn’t until I started dedicating intentional time to recognize where the guilt and shame was coming from and reconnected with my true values, that I was able to give myself the necessary compassion and commit to providing myself with the things I needed.
I bring together these personal experiences, occupational perspective, and the latest on matrescence, to support women to better navigate the many pushes and pulls of motherhood.